1. |
Hot/Cold
01:53
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In a heat wave all those years ago everything changed
Mistake after mistake and now I am who I am today
Staring at the ceiling, wondering if you'd understand
You changed how I saw myself, then you turned around and ran
You are my small town secret
Lock me away
You are my small town secret
Because the way I feel makes me ashamed
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2. |
Upwards...
01:48
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Upwards and onwards I said
But it felt the opposite in my heart and my head
Upwards and onwards I said
Leaving everything I love to pursue what I thought I'd wanted
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3. |
...Onwards
01:28
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After school with your new Gamecube
Playing Tony Hawk's Underground 2
Do you even remember your promise?
You were Chad Muska
I was Jamie Thomas
Now I'm sleeping with boys
You would have hated in high school
Now I am that boy
You would have hated in high school
And I would have hated you too.
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4. |
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Short of breath in the car and I'm freaking out
Heart rate high, this is the end no doubt
Can't stop thinking, thinking about
The ones I'll leave behind
Short of breath in the parking lot I know
Short of breath in the waiting room, I've been here before
And I can wait for an hour, I'll wait for an hour
Until I calm down and then go home
Cuz' if I was gonna die I would have done it in College
Dropped dead on the way to the clinic
If I was gonna die I would have done it in high school
I would have done it before I met you
It'll be okay
You're having a bad day
There's nothing really wrong with you
Take this pill and go away
It'll be okay
Just don't think about it
Don't think about it
As if it wasn't the only thing I could think about
All the people I'll leave behind
And how it will finally feel to die
But if I was gonna die I would have done it in college
Collapse on the treadmill while I'm watching Muary Povich
And if I was gonna die I would have done it in high school
Would have done it before I met you
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5. |
youdonothavecontrolofme
03:05
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What gives you the right to say you understand
What gives you the right to say that you are my friend
This is not high school
This is not his house
You do not have control of me.
How must it have felt when you left me in the dirt
Did you even stop and think that I might be hurt
Do you even think the way that you taught me to think
Always watching my back
My back
Eternally
This is not high school
This is not his house
You do not have control of me.
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6. |
Young, Cool, Happy
00:59
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I saw a couple heading down the hill
I wished I could be like them
Walking hand in hand
Sharing cigarettes
I wished I could be like them
They are so young and cool and happy
They are so young and cool and happy
I wish I could be young and cool and happy
I'll never be young and cool and happy
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7. |
The Hill Beside my Work
04:02
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The hill beside my work
Is so very steep
Why bother to climb at all
When I could stay asleep
The hill beside my work
It grinds down my bones
And when the day is done
I climb back up alone
Climb back up alone
So sit at this desk
From 9 to 5
and when the day is done
You'll barely feel alive
So sit at this desk
For 8 hours a day
And when you are dead
You'll just fade away
And what do you get
At the week's end
A tiny little paycheck
That you will quickly spend
On gas and groceries and alcohol and weed
You can drink drive eat and smoke so you will briefly feel free
to feel free.
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8. |
Foot Race
04:16
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Like a metaphor
The race I'd planned to run cut right through my path to work.
"One more broken promise" I laugh to myself while I sip my beer
The one I know I shouldn't drink while I plan my next year.
My next year.
The one I didn't think I'd see when I turned 18.
But look at me now at 23
and I have accomplished nothing.
I am not a quitter, but boy I sure am tired
I am a fighter, but this is not my fight.
There is a checklist above my workdesk
Not a single item's checked.
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9. |
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Summer bleeds into other seasons
You leave without giving your reason
I drink until I'm no longer speaking
Everyone moves on in their own way.
Some are for better or worse.
Summer, for better or worse.
Getting old is getting old is getting old
And fading out is fading out is fading out
You don't look at me now
The way you looked at me then
Summer for better or worse.
Summer for better or worse.
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A-Pow Newfoundland and Labrador
A-Pow is a sad queer folk punk music person.
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